monogamy blues

written august 15, 2005

why monogamy?

what does it have to do with love? what does it have to with sex?

if we don't get jealous or upset (in a healthy environment) that the friends we love have other friends they spend time with, other friends we may or may not know, then why can't those we are intimate with-emotionally, sexually-do the same?

does love between two people who are sexually intimate come with a possession clause?

if you can spread your love for your parents, your siblings, cousins, family, friends, albeit unequally, then why can't that love extend to another with whom you want to share your innermost thoughts, dreams, desires, your body?

can you be loyal to one while sharing a life with another?

if sex was solely for procreation, wouldn't we have estrus cycles like other animals, instead of a lifetime of choice? would it feel as good?

if the two of your were comepletely open and in agreement, setting boundaries, would you be able to have a healthy, intimate relationship with more than one person?

do we have to study the animal kingdom to validate our own species' monogamous practices?

if you never fall out of love with your family or friends, then why does it happen with someone we've become physically intimate with?

is it possible to have more than one soulmate?

should love be an action word?

should it be a consistent with core values based on mutual respect, care, responsibility and commitment?

does respect and commitment have anything to with who you share your body with?

is it really possible to be happy with one person for the rest of your life?

are we really supposed to sacrifice and compromise our purpose in this world for the greater good, or, til death do us part?

is this truly a GOD sanction or a human institution?

what would our lives be like if it didn't matter our paternity? if we were free to love and live with whomever we choose, and then be just as free to leave when the relationship no longer fulfilled a need?

would we be more careful? or cause more damage?

with what we know now, with more and more people choosing not to stick it out, but equal numbers still holding fast to the belief of one true love, what needs to happen to stop the hurt, the pain, the sacrifice, the suffering, the compromise?